Handling Knockbacks

One of the important points about mentality control is that it is an occasional thing. Not even a saint can respond positively all of the time.And that’s okay.Being perfect at mentality control would actually be really boring.For me, the best use of mentality control is when you get some kind of ‘perceived’ knockback. I say perceived because, when you hold onto a strong Intention, knockbacks are not really that at all.It’s just life rearranging things (although it doesn’t feel like it at the time).The way to handle knockbacks is to do what I call ‘reacting forward.’

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For example…I have a massive Intention for a company I own. Over the past 3 months, a large conglomerate performed due diligence on my company and I convinced myself that a deal was in the works… a significant 9-figure deal.All the signs pointed to a transaction.Then at the last minute, the potential acquirer pulled out. I have no idea why and there was no explanation. That was it. Poof. Over.It felt like a body blow… but only for about 30 minutes.I practice what I preach, and I know that when one door closes another always opens.The challenge for most people is that they are so consumed with grief when they get a knockback, that they’re not looking ‘up and outward’ for the newly opened door.Most people miss it.It does, however, always appear.For the first 15 of the 30 minutes, I sat alone at the kitchen counter. Silence. I asked myself:What just happened?(A number of ‘colorful’ phrases floated around my head. F***!)Okay…Then I did what I always do when I perceive a disappointment:I wrote out my Intention in full.Next, I decided to update the website and tweak my corporate presentation. This is what I refer to as ‘reacting forward.’ I still felt pretty lousy, but I was responding positively to a perceived setback.This is the secret.My wife, Lyn, came into the kitchen and I told her what had happened. We went for lunch together and, when I returned home (I never take my phone or any device out with me when we have lunch), there was a message on my phone.An acquaintance was in the area and asked if we could get together the next day. I try to never let business interrupt my weekends, but I felt obliged to meet with him.When we met for coffee, he introduced me to a broker who immediately had connections to  different companies — none I would have known or thought of.Suddenly, the crazy acquisition adventure was back on.And that’s how it works.So, the next time you perceive some sort of knockback…

  • Remember to take a deep breath
  • Allow a little time for grief
  • React forward
  • Let life take care of the rest

I’m not pretending any of this is easy, but it is simple.And well worth the effort…While I’ll be the first to admit it takes discipline to shrug off perceived setbacks, reacting forward will help you get your sight up…So you won’t miss that next opening door.(And you’ll get a whole lot better with practice).Cheers,


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